Where's the fire

I have seen on other social media lately allot of excitement, angst, and drama. I have even been caught up in some of the political debate. While not deeply invested and I haven't lost any sleep over it, it did get me to wondering.. Where's the fire? Fire takes 3 elemental things to burn... fuel, oxygen and a heat source.  If any of the 3 are missing the fire goes out. Now I am sure by this point you are wondering why I am going on about fire, let me explain.   Proverbs 25v20a states...'Where there is no wood, the fire goes out;'
    Many an argument will die away if we just let it be. Yes it was wrong what they did or said. Yes, it was hurtful how they treated you. Yes, you have the right to stand up for yourself. But friends you can not change people, you can only have control over your part in any situation. Now they may be blowing a bunch of hot air(talking about or spitting hate-oxygen) they may be tossing verbal daggers( heat) but you don't have to add the wood. My dad constantly reminds me not to stir the pot. He says if you stir it it is going to stink. Like most people I have some old, new and very present hurts. I have discovered that if I don't constantly go over my 'they did this, I felt that list' that my hurt heals faster. I guess its like pulling off the scab on a wound. If you keep pulling off the scab it takes longer to heal. Does it make it right that someone yelled or called you a name? No however you got to let go and get to healing. Remove your wood from the fire. Don't feed it, don't stroke it, don't let it have reign over your life, for as long as you do they have reign over you. Turn to the Lord Jesus and ask for his peace and let it reign.
      Now please, don't misunderstand me. There are some people who constantly trample over the line and must be dealt with. However dealing with them may mean not acknowledging  them and letting them stew in their own juices. It may be you have to tell them that they are acting in an inappropriate manner you will no longer deal with them..have a good life! But above all you need to release(forgive) them. Forgiveness isn't for their benefit but your. I guess all this is a little rambling but in the common language--take your dog out of the fight. Because without wood the fire goes out, without your eyes or ears seeking out what or who said what, your pain will ease. Anyone who knows you will know if someone is lying on you.
    If the offender is someone you must deal with, limit the access they have to you. By pursuing a less dramatic existence you will have a more pleasant one.